Marriage. Why The Rush?

I’ve reached the stage in my life where I’m bombarded with the question ‘When are you getting married?’  Now, if you know me, you know that this question grinds my gears. But what makes matters worse is that it’s now followed by the statement, ‘you’re not getting any younger’. WHAT? I’m NOT getting any younger?  And all this time I thought I was Benjamin Button. Thanks for clearing that one up.

I’m only 22. Don’t people know that we don’t live in Elizabethan times and we don’t have to get married before the age of 20 and pop out 5 kids before we turn 24. Am I right? I’m not ready to be an adult; I still eat Milo out of the jar for heaven sake. Seriously, if you feel ready for all those things then it’s all good, but if you don’t, don’t for one second feel bad about it.

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Game Of Thrones’ Sansa’s reaction when finding out she has to get married at the age of 13

Life is not a competition. We’re all running your own race so it doesn’t matter when you reach the ‘finish line’. It’s cool if you want to live your life getting to know yourself as much as you can, before you have to live it with someone else and getting to know them.

I get excited when I hear my friends or my cousins are getting married. Marriage can be beautiful. The idea used to scare me but it doesn’t scare me as much anymore. I’m just not ready at this moment and that’s okay.

When I do get married, I hope it’s lovely and I hope we can watch New Girl and Friends together and take spontaneous road trips and (similar taste in music would be a bonus). But for now, my betrothal will just have to wait a little longer.

wedding photography

Right now I’m starting out in my career, I’m partially saving up to see the world (ok, at least one country) and I’m finding out what I’m good at (Note to self: painting isn’t one of them).

So people, stop asking other people when they’re getting married, because when they actually are getting married, you’re going to feel awfully embarrassed when they give you a date and you find out you aren’t invited.

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9 thoughts on “Marriage. Why The Rush?

  1. EXACTLY!
    I get asked that question at least 5 times a week. And its not even just old people that ask!
    This needs to stop.
    Maybe start a movement or something.

  2. I’ve been a victim of this from the time I started campus! Oh my word. You can just imagine the relief (more than the happiness!!) when I got engaged and people stopped bothering me about it. I somehow used to get the feeling that those asking the questions think there’s something ‘wrong’ with you for not getting married. *rolls eyes*

    Weirdly enough, the one lady that DID bother me the most about it, didn’t end up getting invited to my wedding! (And that was my parents’ choice).

    I’m proud of your attitude 🙂 And don’t let them questions bother you too much… ’cause when your time comes, it’ll be so mind blowing, they’ll be left speechless!

  3. I really find ti it to be a “thing” in Cape Town to get married young. When I grew up in JHB, there wasn’t even the mere thought at 20 etc about marriage and I can see it now at my advanced years of 25, soon to be 26, when I compare my friends from JHB to my friends in CT.

    There seems to be a greater rush down here to do the wedding-aisle hustle and people are almost damn near offended when they hear I’m in no way inclined yet to put down ‘lebola’.

  4. 26 this year… no plans to get married anytime soon… Life is just too full of twists and turns in order for me to bother with settling down… Maybe that’s just the thing, why do we have to “settle”? Cant life just be awesome, and then we die?

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